Dear Diary,
Hi, its me Melanie, I know its been a long time since writing, but I thought that at eighteen I would have outgrown this kind of thing. Life’s been pretty shitty since mom and dad split up. Sis and I are leaving for a boarding school in a few weeks and I hate the idea. Dad’s job keeps him away most of the time, and mom says she needs some time to herself. Maybe it won’t be so bad once we get there, but it’s starting off terribly. Last week mom got a notice in the mail reminding her that all students that will be participating in sports or cheerleading must have a doctor’s release before arriving at school. Mom called our family doctor, a man I do not like at all, and made an appointment. The following week I went for my checkup and had the worst, most humiliating day of my life.
After sitting in the waiting room for a long time the nurse called me in. Mom was right behind me, I told her she could wait out here, but the nurse said the doctor wanted to speak with her. I was shown to a examining room while mom was in the doctor’s office. After about ten minutes mom came in and said that she and the doctor were going over my medical records for school, I was told that there were a couple of shots that I was missing and that they would given today. I hate needles Then mom dropped the bomb, she said that since I was eighteen and going away that I was ready for my first women’s physical. I wasn’t real sure what she meant but I knew I wouldn’t like it. Mom was one of those people who believe that the doctor is always right so it would do no good to argue, after all how bad could it be?
The doctor came in a few minute’s later and asked if we were ready, I said no but it did no good. I asked mom to please wait out in the waiting room, but before she could move the doctor told her to stay. I don’t think mom had any intention of leaving anyway. The doctor began writing something on my chart, he than looked up at me and told me to remove all my clothes. I looked around for a screen or dressing room but saw none. I asked him where I could change and was told to undress where I was. I asked him for a gown or sheet or something and was told that he had seen it all before. I am eighteen and have not changed with my mother in the room since I was ten. This was really becoming a bad day. I told the doctor that I refuse to strip with no gown or cover up, so he finally went and got me one. I turned and faced the wall while I removed my shirt and bra, then I put the gown on before pulling off my jeans and panties.
When I finished I walked over and sat on the examination table. I was told that I put the gown on backwards, that it should be tied in the back not the front. I could tell nothing I do will make him happy, especially since I had the nerve to talk back to him. While I was sitting there he was filling two large syringes, and did I ever pray that he wasn’t going to use them on me. I wanted to cry when he walked over with them and put them down on a tray next to the table. I was to lay face down on the table, when I did I felt him lifting the gown to uncover my butt. He hadn’t uncovered me enough to give me the shots so I had no idea what he was doing. I was totally unprepared when I felt him spread my cheeks and push a thermometer in my butt. Nobody had done this to me since I was four years old. I let him know that there was no need for this, that I was not a little baby. I looked at my mother who just told me not to argue with the doctor. After he removed the thermometer he lifted the gown higher, fully exposing my rear end. Not that I am all that shy about my body, but at eighteen and to have your temperature taken in your butt with your mother standing there watching, I think that going a little to far.
Now that my rear end was fully uncovered I knew what was coming. I saw him pick up the first syringe and move toward me. I felt the alcohol swab on my butt, then he told me not to move. He also said I might feel a slight sting. He jabbed me and I just wanted to jump off the table. That shot hurt so bad that I almost started to cry. He said the worst was over that the other one wouldn’t hurt, he moved to the other cheek and poked me. It hurt, he lied.
Now I was told to sit up, he did all the normal things a doctor does for a check up, eyes, ears, throat etc. Then I was told to lie on my back, as I did the doctor pulled the gown apart, leaving me fully exposed in the front. I know I was turning red from embarrassment, after all what eighteen year old wants to be fully exposed in front of her mom ?
He began pushing and squeezing my breasts. Since they are fairly small this should have taken a lot less time than it did. He then moved to my abdomen, pushing and asking if I had any pain. I don’t think I would have told him if I had. As bad as this seemed it was about to get worse. I was told to slide to the end of the table, and put my feet in the stirrups. I guess I didn’t move fast enough to please him because he grabbed my hips and pulled me down. I just stayed there while he was putting on a pair of rubber gloves and I knew what he was about to do. He told me to move my legs apart, but before I had a chance to move he reached up, and spread my knees. Mom was standing at that end of the table and now she had full view of my crotch. I thought that it couldn’t get any worse but I was wrong. Before I knew what was happening he doctor was pushing his fingers up inside me. I don’t remember ever feeling so sick in my life, and mom just stood there watching, letting this happen.
After a minute of feeling around inside me I was relieved to feel his hand coming out. I thought this ordeal was almost over, but then the worst part. All of a sudden I felt his one finger reenter my vagina while the other was probing my butt. Then I felt a sharp pain as he pushed his finger into my rear end. At this point all I want to do is crawl into a big hole and die.
The more he poked around, the more I started to yell. Mom told me to be quiet, but I told her it hurt a lot. He finally finished, but by this time I was crying and all I wanted to do was to get out of that office, and away from that doctor. When I went to sit up I was told not to. The doctor told my mother that he noticed a rash in my pubic area. I tried to tell him it was from a change in laundry soap and that it was clearing up. He refused to listen to me, he told my mother that it would have to be treated as a skin rash. She asked what she needed to do. The doctor told her to treat it right he would need to shave off my pubic hair.
That was it for me. I got up, grabbed my clothes and went into the restroom down the hall. I dressed faster than ever before and ran all the way home. That was a week ago and mom and I haven’t said two words to each other since. Two more days and I leave for school. I can’t wait.
